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| Question: |
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for information on ECT Electroconvulsive Therapy G |
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Dear G, It can be difficult to stay at the side of a wave rider when we are either running off chasing our next great idea or so down in the dumps that we cannot move. Please understand that often, though not right, we will choose to lash out at those we love the most. Usually, it has very little to do with the person that we are angry at. We are usually angry at ourselves for getting into too many things and not being able to keep them going. We get angry because we cannot stay on the "up" wave. When we learn to moderate our waves and design our lives from a mid-wave view we begin to also become better people and usually much nicer to those around us. When you are very close to someone you are sometimes that last person that will be able to help. You will only be able to help if you have set up something (like trigger words) prior to any swing in mood. Usually what we need most is space without judgement. It is always best to talk to us about serious matters when we are in the mid-wave as we will be too optimistic on the high wave and too pessimistic during the low wave. The real us lies in the middle. Good luck with the
discussion. I hope you get lots of replies. |
| Dear G, I am Bi-Polar and was diagnosed shortly after breaking up with someone who was Bi-Polar. Now that was one wavy relationship! I don't think I'd suggest that to anyone. I find myself thinking maybe we could have made it work if I'd know more about Bi and had known I was also. Oh well, it is over. I think I dealt much better with them when I was in a good place, then it was easier for me to remember the love and not take the moods or things they said seriously. So I guess I suggest reading and asking this question is a good start. If you and your honey can work together I think you may come to appreciate the up, but not too up fun and creative times! Wish I could be more help! One note: my honey decided not to take meds and became violent which I did not understand what was going on or Bi-Polar so did not handle as well as I might have. I don't suggest anyone allow the violent storms some of us have-to go untreated, it is OK to protect yourself and any children, and the spouse too! One thing I like about my life is I'm never bored! I've been diagnosed about two years now and the first year suffered from a concussion from auto accident which I think set off the really bad times I had that led to my being in hospital for first time, that and the abuse. I think learning more and more will help me and I'VE GOT TO GET A COPY OF THE BOOK! Zemira |
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Dear Zemira Send a Reply to G. |
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Dear G,
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Dear G I am known to be a happy, generous, optimistic person by those in our community, family, etc, but I have to confess that, on the inside, I am both depressed and afraid. I find that I can never make long term plans of any sort, as the decisions jointly made will most certainly be unmade. I can't invite people for dinner next Saturday, because my husbands mood will have changed by then. Our finances are in a terrible shambles despite the fact that he makes a good deal of money, and my anxiety levels are, though subdued, over the top. How do you cope? I am 42 and have been married 20 years. I married so young that I have never really led my own life- job, house, kids, etc.- and question whether I could really manage on my own. Counsellors and family members, including my daughter, have encouraged me to leave many times. Do you ever feel like your life is so filled with caring for the glaring needs of your wife -including trying to stave off impending swings toward mania or depression or cleaning up the aftermath- that there is little room for you to live your OWN life? I have utterly forgotten what my hopes and dreams used to be. Now I just hope that he doesn't quit his job again and that we stave off bankruptcy. Sorry to sound so
glum. It's an old question that I have never been able to ask of someone
who has been there. :
) C Send a Reply
to C. |
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